I feel like wedding fever is the new Nutella on Pinterest and Tumblr, and it makes me wonder a little bit about where girls’ priorities are when it comes to marriage. Now, I’ll be the first to cry at a wedding, and even scripted sitcom weddings and Queer Eye for the Straight Guy proposals, but the more and more viral proposal videos I see circulating, I know in my gut that I would be mortified to be that woman. Have me weeping in public?? Hell no, I’m a hideous crier (think Claire Danes). Of course, I’m not in a position where this is relevant in my life, but I do have some thoughts:
First of all, in front of friends/family/waitstaff/theme park employees/hot air balloon operators/commuters/etc. is NOT the ideal place to make a life changing decision. Secondly, “Will you marry me?” seems very one sided. If I ever get married, it’ll stem from a heart to heart CONVERSATION, where we both get to talk. I think the sentiment alone of wanting to officially be partners for life trumps any elaborate set up or fancy meal it could come with.
Third thing I gotta comment on is the diamond. I understand its significance as a [very expensive] formal agreement to “seal the deal”… but you wouldn’t marry a man who wasn’t a man of his word, and again, it’s pretty one-sided. My official stance on the matter is: either my man and I are iced out, or neither of us are. Furthermore, I don’t want my man to have to ask for anything on his knees, EVER, not even for me.
I think we all assume that these are protocol for popping the question. What we don’t question is why we buy into these things. I know it seems like these huge gestures and mindless traditions are the only way to show/know how you feel about your significant other, but in the grander scheme of things, I would rather invest the effort into the partnership, and not only just the proposal/wedding. After all, I only have so many fucks to give.